Oh my. I just had a WOW moment. This wasn't only about my son. It was also about me. I am humbled.
I have been browsing Ten Things Your Student with Autism Wishes You Knew by Ellen Notbohm. I already had Ten Things the Child with Autism Wishes You Knew but I picked up the Student version thinking it might be even better when sharing books with our teachers.
So I am reading along. There are a lot of "oh yeah" moments but for some reason this one hit home.
"I also urge you to be as gentle in your efforts to change your student's or child's behavior as you could reasonably expect of yourself. It strikes me as sheer lunacy how much we expect of our students with autism in the area of behavior modification when we as adults find it so difficult to accomplish ourselves. Every darn New Year's, out come the same tired old behavior-modification resolutions; lose weight, stop smoking, spend less money, exercise more. By the end of January, it's usually all over but the shouting. What real right do we have to expect greater inner fortitude of a child living with perpetual neurological challenge than we are able to muster ourselves."
Duh! Weight loss. I can't even lose 5 pounds (and I have a lot more than 5 that I need to lose). Spending. I can't seem to control myself and I don't even want to talk about exercise. I've tried it all. My inner fortitude is not impressive. How humbling.
I have never been more in awe of my son. The control he does maintain 75% of the time is very impressive. I've often suspected it and here is more proof that he has a lot to teach me.
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5 comments:
Oh, thank you for this. What a gentle reminder to all of us. We set the bar very high at times--perhaps a tad too high?
Our kids are truly the heroes, aren't they?
I think of this all the time. Our kids have to work SO hard. Not only are they expected to do all of the "normal" kid stuff, but then we throw them through numerous therapies, diets, etc. And, half the time we're trying to find something that works the *best*, so we change gears without their understanding of why. Our kids are awesome.
Good point! (Still catching up.)
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