Forwarding address

www.mwam.vox.com

Why are we moving? A few fellow bloggers have moved over there. As I explored I found that it could solve some of my privacy concerns.

One big perk is that I can easily upload video. Another critical point for me is that I can create a post and decide if I want it to be visible to everyone or just friends or family. For now, almost everything is available to everyone.

However, if you want to join my friends list, you will need to send me an email so I can add you to my list. I just might have pictures and juicier stories for you guys!

I can be reached at
momwithoutamanual@yahoo.com

I hope you don't mind changing your bookmarks. I promise the commute is no longer than you are used to! I think you will like my new neighborhood as well! I hope to see you there.

Fair expectations

Oh my. I just had a WOW moment. This wasn't only about my son. It was also about me. I am humbled.

I have been browsing Ten Things Your Student with Autism Wishes You Knew by Ellen Notbohm. I already had Ten Things the Child with Autism Wishes You Knew but I picked up the Student version thinking it might be even better when sharing books with our teachers.

So I am reading along. There are a lot of "oh yeah" moments but for some reason this one hit home.

"I also urge you to be as gentle in your efforts to change your student's or child's behavior as you could reasonably expect of yourself. It strikes me as sheer lunacy how much we expect of our students with autism in the area of behavior modification when we as adults find it so difficult to accomplish ourselves. Every darn New Year's, out come the same tired old behavior-modification resolutions; lose weight, stop smoking, spend less money, exercise more. By the end of January, it's usually all over but the shouting. What real right do we have to expect greater inner fortitude of a child living with perpetual neurological challenge than we are able to muster ourselves."

Duh! Weight loss. I can't even lose 5 pounds (and I have a lot more than 5 that I need to lose). Spending. I can't seem to control myself and I don't even want to talk about exercise. I've tried it all. My inner fortitude is not impressive. How humbling.

I have never been more in awe of my son. The control he does maintain 75% of the time is very impressive. I've often suspected it and here is more proof that he has a lot to teach me.

24 hours of isolation

You may recall my daydream of 23 days spent in isolation.

Well the warden has issued me a day reprieve. I've been informed that my presence at home is not warranted. I have a motel room a couple miles away where I am to rest my head tonight. I have a massage scheduled at 4pm after which I will be checking into my quiet, dark, aggressively air conditioned room.

What will I do? I have a book I'd like to finish. I have sleep to catch up on. I might just lay there and listen to the silence! When I crawl out of bed tomorrow morning at 10:50am (check out time is 11am) I will revel in the fact that I was not up at 9am driving JP to camp. I will relish the fact that I am not currently checking him out of camp to take him to his speech group.

While I am sitting at a restaurant peacefully eating my lunch I will think about DWAM chasing and attempting to entertain T for the full hour and a half during the speech therapy group. Dad will be anxious as the parent room will have 3 or 4 other parents. He will feel that he has to keep T quiet so they don't disturb these other parents who are watching their children participate at speech time. I wish him luck. I hope he has time to actually watch some of JP during this time.

Around 1pm I will be cruising the mall in search of a present for DWAM's birthday next week. While I am strolling the mall, DWAM and T will be trying to figure out how to pass time until JP's day at camp is done. They will have returned him to camp from speech but find that it would be ridiculous to drive 30 minutes home just to sit for about 45 minutes and then drive the 30 minutes back to pick him up. Oh the agony! Since DWAM only works a few miles away I am guessing that it will be show and tell time. I'm sure his co-workers will welcome the distraction.

Besides with all that driving T would fall asleep. And if T falls asleep in the van it will make it impossible for Dad to walk into camp to claim JP. So that cat nap would ruin the possibility of a real nap for T. Because in T's world a nap is when he closes his eyes. He doesn't register that it was 10 minutes or 3 hours. Guess what! If they closed and they are now open than he is done napping! I have tried to warn Dad but he doesn't seem concerned. So I guess we'll plan for T to have a cat nap tomorrow. Oh well.

After finding the perfect present for DWAM I will head home and wait for my guys to return. Perhaps I will take a nap while I wait. They probably won't be home until 3:30 or 4:00pm.

Should I be evil and ask DWAM what he is cooking for supper? It isn't like he had to work or anything...he was on vacation after all!